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Thursday, May 13, 2010

Roofing in Dallas as Compared to other cities.

Dallas homeowners love Timberline. They prefer architectural roofing. In the wealthier areas of Southlake, Colleyville, Frisco, and McKinney, they might even put on Gerard, cement, or standing seam. The colors are usually subdued with composition roofs but metal roofs and tile roofs can be colorful. The proximity of homes in the city usually makes loud colors clash.
In East Dallas we refer to the slate roofs around Gaston Avenue as candy land due to the variety of blended slate roofs. The have an exception class grandfathered in on color as those homes were built when men wore fedoras and women had fruit on their heads.
In the countryside the distance between homes allows for bright colors. As a lot of rural folks love metal, they often get green, blue, red, but not pink. Won't do it. It takes a real man to put pink on his roof. Metal also suits them well as there no Lewisville or Carrollton to break the wind. If you don't brake wind, wind breaks you.
When you head out to Gun Barrel, Maybank, Trinidad, or Seven Points, you see a lot of "R" panel roofs. The exposed fasteners will leak one day when the grommets wear out and if Stupid Roofing hasn't smeared pookie all over them, they can be removed and larger ones put in.
Some people take their big city roofing culture with them to the country and put on a weathered wood Timberline and they lose their opportunity to look unique.
Dark roofs push roof lines down so if you have a lower slope don't put on black.
When you match the roof to the brick you look bland. Compliment and contrast.
If the brick is mottled use a more uniform color but if the brick or stone is uniform, go variegated
There are some subdivisions, Carrollton for example, where there are seas of homes with the same roof. The builder did it because he saved $0.25 per square on a large buy.
These people come home on New Years and can't find their home. It's a crime that they drive around all toasted and walk in on their neighbors two streets while they're doing the annual Bacchus ritual. Really kinda spoils the mood. Usually.
Want to discuss gun control? It could go both ways here folks.
Don't try that in the country. I digress.
The immigrants who move into the nicer homes color up the inside but usually try to fit in with the crowd on the outside appearance. I love to show them Gerard, usually terracotta or red, but a gringo is more likely to buy color because aliens hate to be stigmatized. It can really hurt.
So, city=conservative and county=wild. On roofs that is.
In the 1960's Dallas was a sea of wood shingles and white three tabs or "T" Locks. The 70's saw the rise of weathered wood dimensional roofing and cedar blend or sand like colored three tabs. Later in the nineties roofs went overwhelmingly gray, like me. My roof looks like snow and I baa baa when I get sheared.
The roof on my home is a red steel tile.
Now-a-days you never know what someone is going to select. We live in a time of many selections. My rear bumper drags due to the weight of the samples. Slowly but surely we're selecting styles and colors on line. Can you believe that if a roofing sample gets rained on it is ruined? Can you say "oxymoron?"
"Sorry Sir, My roof sample got wet and dissolved. Can I come over when it's dry?" Well it never rains in the internets. (Stupid red squiggly line. Just what does it want?)
When you look at homes built before 1990, most were walkable but since then the widowmaker has been in vogue. I think Carrollton, Plano, Southlake, Colleyville, Frisco, and McKinney passed ordinances that said roofs must be as treacherous as possible. The architects of today must be reincarnated roofers with a wicked sense of humor. If I knew that was going to happen I might have made a different career choice. Tooooo late buddy.
To compensate I learned to measure from the ground with a pitch gauge but ratcheted things up a nacho and measure from the sky. Many call it satellite but it's really Piper Cubs. The DOD wanted to help roofers so they photographed all the buildings in America, and who knows where else, and set up a puppet company along the lines of a Chines industry owned by shadowy generals with world domination in mind. In a moment of weakness they sold us the rights, well leased, and when we got good and addicted, up'd the price.
When Pictometry leased us the program I got no kisses. After the signing ceremony I asked the high pressure salesman how do we save the data. He said that was an extra $800.00.
After they picked me up off the floor and quit banging on my chest I asked the liar why he didn't tell me first. He slurred something about his bosses not wanting to let us know about it until they got the money so they could get some more money.
I restrained my adjectives but swallowed pride. I told him I couldn't wait until we had circled the sun one more time so I could go find a lesser crook. The system worked well but we found a better one.
I am one vindictive consumer and I treat my customers right because they might be one too. Not really. I do it because I love to help people. I want them to like me and say I'm great. Flattery is really nice when you deserve it. When polar opposites occur I can put on the hair shirt and chant in Medieval Latin phrases with a Gregorian intonation while flagellating the camel tail on my bare back. Don't take me literally here. I just feel guilty and bear gifts. We used to give camel gifts but the tails are frightening and the bear has no tail.
This is a real rambler so I better stop and say Dallas, Fort Worth, Arlington, Irving, I love you for helping provide me and my family a living for 32 years putting on roofs, siding and windows. I've made a lot of friends and hope to make some more.
You must have been really bored to have got to here. I'll make it up to you somehow.